270310 The Land of Make Believe

U gotta see to believe.

What's in store? More than you can chew...

7:30 am local time
With a smile that would melt the naughtiest boy and skin as soft as Thai silk, this petite like elf from heaven draped the garland of scented sea shells over me.

Beauty & the beast (Half Man Half Horse)

I was so hungry I could eat her (Literally). Tongue wagging...

The 45 minus bus ride from the landing strip to Phuket's main area made me drool for more.

Sino-Portuguese architecture dominates the narrow streets. Lines & lines of these old structures give a surreal feeling, as if you're thrown back in time into the early 1900. Influences can also be found in Melaka, Penang & Sarawak, straits settlement during the colonial era. Incidentally Peranakans, known as "Phuket Babas" in the local tongue, have family ties with the Peranakans of Malaysia.

There's also a large number of Muslims in Phuket, many are of Malay blood-lines, mainly descendants of the island's original sea-dwelling people. This is where the 7th generation of the famous legend from Pulau Langkawi, Malaysia was born.

Wan Aishah, pretty lass...

Indeed, Wan Aishah is the seventh generation descendent of Mahsuri which signified the end of the curse but also to those who knew the family heritage. For years, Wan Aishah has heard family members talking about the beautiful Mahsuri but she never paid much attention to the hushed conversations as she was interested in just having fun, like all young girls. But the past was not about to leave Aishah alone. About two years ago, officials from the Kedah Historical Society visited Kampung Kamala, Phuket to seek out the living relatives of Mahsuri. They made enquires and succeeded in locating the descendants. What they discovered left them a little awed. The legend of Mahsuri has not only intrigued Malaysians but also found a following in Thailand. In Phuket, Aishah's family is widely known as the 'White Blooded' family.

Why white blood? When Mahsuri was stabbed (As a result of a wild accusation that she committed adultery), white blood oozed from her wound as she bled to death!

"Although I have always heard stories about Mahsuri, I never knew that I played a key role in unlocking an old curse," said Wan Aishah. "For two years, the officers came to our home asking lots of questions to verify that we were direct descendants of Mahsuri. My grandfather, Wan Husin, told them numerous stories about our family and even showed them the Keris (dagger) and sword that was used to stab Mahsuri," said Aishah. "Although I believe that I am the seventh generation of Mahsuri, I find it hard to believe that with my birth, a curse that drove a once prosperous island to poverty, has been lifted," said the puzzled lass in Thai. But after making an official visit to Langkawi last year, the petite Aishah, who is often called a princess in her hometown, have no doubts about her own importance. Interestingly enough, in the 1980s - seven (7) generations later - Langkawi awoke from its slumber and has in the last decade has become a thriving tourism destination both for domestic as well as international travelers. That's another story...

Spectacular view - lousy seafood

The introduction of our tour guide was often interrupted by his unstoppable hyena like laughter resembling my granny, the shaman - going into a trance. No doubt Don is quite informative & well versed about the local customs, culture, historical and contemporary heritage interpretation - Speaking in Tinglish (A mix of Thai & English), It can be pretty amusing & ticklish trying to figure out what he's really talking about. He would break out into laughter at the slightest provocation. Yeah...Tinglish can be very Ticklish...

Phuket is divided into 3 districts (Amphoer), Mueang Phuket, Kathu & Thelang - which are further subdivided into 17 sub districts (Tambon) and 103 villages (Muban). We will then pass by the Amphoer Thelang (Amphoer - District), enter Amphoer Mhueang (Phuket Town) & it will lead straight to Amphoer Theraju (Phuket Beach). One of the most popular tourist areas on Phuket is Patong Beach on the central western coast, perhaps owing to the easy access to its wide and long beach. "There are many beaches as in bitches here..." & Don breaks into another laughing fit.

Transport matters, how you go about riding it - is your business.

Most of Phuket's nightlife and its cheap shopping is located in Patong, and the surrounding areas has become increasingly over-developed - blaming modernization as the cause. The actual culprits are, us humans. We encroach forest reserves, tear-up their virginity & plunder. Patong means "The forest filled with banana leaves" in Thai. When in the old days, before plastic came into picture, banana leaves was the only thing besides paper are used as wrappers.

Now Patong beach thrives with "Fruits form a different kind". As you'd see loads of lifeless bodies parading their tanned/sun-baked circular & semi-elongated imported produce, for free, by the beach. I was spoilt for choice.

Reminds me of the song by Brian Applegate which was composed by DEVO - 34C

34 C isn't good enough for me. I need to have, at least a D
Big ones, round ones, fat ones, too. Itty bitty teeny ones just won't do
Big ones, round ones, firm ones, too. I'd like to see the ones on you!

Phuket formerly known as Tha-Laang or Talang, or Junk Ceylon in Western sources, a distortion of the Malay Tanjung Salang, i.e. "Cape Salang") is one of the southern provinces (Changwat) of Thailand. Neighboring provinces are (from north clockwise) Phang Nga and Krabi, but as Phuket is an island there are no land boundaries.

The name Phuket (of which the ph sound is an aspirated p) is apparently derived from the word "Bukit" in Malay which means hill, as this is what the island appears like from a distance. The island is mostly mountainous with a mountain range in the west of the island from the north to the south.The mountains of Phuket form the southern end of the Phuket mountain range, which ranges for 440 km from the Kra Isthmus. The highest elevation of the island is Mai Thao Sip Song (Twelve Canes), at 529 m above sea level &it's the biggest island in Thailand, with an estimated total area of approximately 570 square kilometers. The region was formerly referred to as "Thelang," derived from the old Malay "Telong" which means "Cape." The northern district of the province, which was the location of the old capital, still uses this name.

Don had suggested that we all go for a "Soft-soft" program after breakfast. It got me thinking..."Soft-soft" program this early? You must be joking. 24/7 in Phuket? Whoa!!!

Oh...what he meant about "Soft-soft" was some light tour - mild shopping & sight seeing. We visited the biggest cashew nut factory & bought home bundles of T-shirts from another.

Panyee Island, the Muslim village on stilts.

Fresh produce from the sea, lunch in Panyee Island was so delicious , I was lucky to be seated in a table for eight. As four decided to go on a diet, I bloated my belly with crabs, squids grilled sea bass. Right after which we surveyed the caves via air-filled canoes.

Kuala Lumpur has the KL Tower and Thailand has Puget FantaSea. It’s packed with tourists, cameras are a required accessory, and there are an untold number of souvenir shops to spend money in. With building designs that are occasionally wacky, over-the-top costumes, and elephants milling about, Phuket FantaSea has all the subtlety of a mouthful of Thai chilies. But it can’t be avoided; everyone should go once.

The result is a stunning 140-acre theme complex, packed with a multitude of activities and entertainment with no shortage of ways to pass the time before the show starts: The magnificent Palace of the Elephants is a state-of-the-art theater with wonderful acoustics and seating 3,000 persons. Fronted by a glorious reconstruction of a Sukhothai-era stone palace, with intriguing elephant statues, the theater puts on a spell-binding show combining culture and illusion that is almost beyond belief.

“Fantasy of a Kingdom” Culture-Illusion ShowThe ultimate state-of-the-art, breath-taking Las Vegas-style theatrical show that inspires from Thailand's Myths, Mysteries and Magic.
The story isn’t easy to follow, and it doesn’t matter. Loud and funny moments interrupted by quiet, beautiful interludes do a great job conveying the emotion. The end result is a display that’s as dazzling as the sights outside the theatre. Young children, old children, and adult children all enjoy the show.

In the middle of the show, all off a sudden you'll have chickens, goats & pigeons crossing the stage. It’s not tough to believe elephants can become accomplished actors, but this show also employs goats, roosters, water buffalo, and doves in supporting roles.I mean, pigeons can be trained but chickens running across the stage is plain bizarre!!!

Superb archirtecture, trunk fountain & all.

No wonder it's billed as “The ultimate cultural theme park”. Tough for me to come up with a better description. Sets slides in & go. Flooring sinks to the abyss & reemerged as a beautiful flora & fauna. Ariel Avatar like creatures hung precariously above the skies, illuminated by fluorescent. So sexy it overwhelms your soul...

me & my twin pondering the future...or the past.

A carnival village with an assortment of choices. From t-shirts to beachwear to jewelery – Everything is big, bright, ornate, and made to impress. Be an elephant's mahout for a trip around the Songbird Luminarie. Head to Simian Adventure Center where you monkey around with Darwin's cousin, sorry he's an ape bcoz he believes so - I descended from the human race.

A sea-themed arcade full of games or hop on a carousel/merry go round till you vomit, the kids are sure to love. Or visit the photo studio and dress the family in traditional Thai costumes or cross-dress Tranny like. I know, some men have a penchant for knickers...

The Golden Kinnaree Buffet Restaurant is a perfect example of the park’s El-Grande. It cavernous hall seats 4,000 hungry souls. Amidst a mystical Himmaphan forest setting, there is also a Muslim buffet section where visitors can indulge in a sumptuous gluttony of Royal Thai dishes and delicacies.

Here mythical Kinnarees, half-bird and half-woman of legendary beauty, voluptuous and gracious, look after their guests like proverbial queens.

Sagittarius, the positive extrovert sign. This half man half horse of masculine that oozes sensuality (Pleasure). Vainness is him but don't be apprehensive. His honesty (Blunt), believe in justice, have boundless imagination, very open-minded, wit, intellect with flashes of intuition. He can be too generous but never tie him down as he despises captivity & enjoys freedom of movement & the outdoors.

Guys, can you tell the difference?

And ladies - wouldn't you just die for a figure like that?

Once upon a time if you wanted to see boys who pretend to be girls (so well that it's hard to tell they're boys - if they still are) then you had one choice: Simon Cabaret is probably the biggest "Tranny/Transgender/Transvestite" cabaret show on earth. This show features a spectacular musical floor show performed by the world famous "Transformers". I can't help but eyeball their over-inflated assets, with a glee.

As pretty as they are, they look molded from the same cast. A tray of soft buns/cup cakes sure looks alike.

However, in Thailand, I was made to believe: Due to the considerable tolerance of the culture, the theatrical performances of men dressed as women have always been accepted and a great number of males, who feel more natural as females, find a career as cabaret performers. Well not really... Armed with a pocket size point & shoot camera, like a seasoned pro journalist - interviewed 3 lady boys & all of them agreed that a lot of men somehow treat them differently.

Sauda, the lady-boy from Chiang Mai

Who are you to judge whatever their preferences are. We always talk about racism - racial segregation. What about sexual segregation? God made us different but you decide the path that you wanna follow - the choice is yours alone...

The lavish sets and brilliant costumes will amaze you. Performers lip-synch songs popular in countries around the world. Tina Turner clone who would then harass the audience. Listen-up! Make sure you're seated somewhere in between the other sea of people. If you're UNlucky she'll suffocate u with her pumpkins.

Snap a shot with them & give some tips or you'll be hounded till kingdom come. Some cheapskate had a taste of it that nite. All of a sudden, coarse voices of displeasure started to appear. Gone were the ever loving flying kisses & love calling.

Nail Island

Ko Tapu (Nail Island, also sometimes referred as Khao Tapu, nail hill) is an islet located in the Phang Nga Bay, Thailand. It's a steep rocky monolith, about 20 meters tall. This rock column lies approximately 200 meters offshore of the two-islet pair known as Ko Khao Phingkan (Hills resting on each other island). The islands are located within the Ao Phang Nga National Park.

Departing from Phuket Island, our long tail boats landed at nearby Ko Khao Phingkan. There where souvenir booths & you climb up the peak for a breathtaking aerial view of the neighboring islands. Ko Tapu has become a popular tourist attraction since it was featured in the James Bond movie The Man with the Golden Gun in 1974; for this reason, it is also often referred to as James Bond Island (the later 1997 James Bond film Tomorrow Never Dies also includes a scene in Phang Nga Bay, close to James Bond Island).

Come to think of it now I believe why the producers choose this particular island for the movie. The phallic looking rock formation of the island reflects the endless/never ending innuendo of James Bond.

For the last nite in Phuket, like owls, we roamed around aimlesslly in nearby Patong. It's loud, it's raunchy and it's utterly unforgettable. Free transvestite performances can be enjoyed in many of the open air bars. 4-5 beauties will squeeze atop small terrazzo tables. Oogle while you can, mouth wide open in awe, saliva dripping with shock but with a mixed feelings.

Unsure of how to react to the situation, as usual - this cool dude on a NatGeo coverage, I coyly (With a slight blush) took some vids of them gyrating to the heart pounding & blaring disco beat.

The prettiest "Angel" in white gazed at me, sunk an arrow thru my eyes, deep into my soul - Oh what a sight to behold...

The early morning tiger & tigress show was tops in the agenda. Located right smack in the middle of Bangla Road, we had to squeeze thru a maze of intoxicated looking men & women, merrily drowning themselves to the throbbing & ear splitting music yet again.

It was a let down. I thought they're going to tear apart, growl or gnaw or at least snarl at one another. All they did was purr, quiver & at the height of it, stiff muscles went into spasm & released an endless moan toward the end of the show. Naive me.

Bangla Road, no see any Bangladeshi here. Lotta Male-she. It should be renamed "She-Male Road".

Sin & follow the wrong path - you'll GET God's wrath!
No wonder Tsunami wiped some of them off in December 26, 2004.

Nikon compact L16, RM380 only lah
Innuendo = An incredibly pleasurable experience.
Oogle = To gaze in admiration.

THAI LOVE STORY
A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend in a hotel in the Thai resort of Phuket.
After having great **x, she spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles -
something she just loved to do.
As he was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, "Why do you like doing that?"
"Because", she replied, "I really miss mine."

Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

Dead or Alive - **X Drive

French kisses a thing of the past
Were too young to die so we'd better live fast
The dying is easy the urge is so hard
If your looking for funking then get into my car
I'm a mercedes benz why dont you jump on in
I got a rear view mirror you can watch us in
The harder you drive the smoother i go
I got my engine running

**X drive it sees no gender or color
So lets get together and collide with each other
**X drive aw you know how it feels
Get out of my car and get under my wheels

**X drive(x4)
Hoi!
Ooooohhhhhaaaaaaaa...

Oh the suns coming down
The nights coming inI got a brain for business and a body for sin
So shoot like a rocket cuz my engine is hot
If you want whats forbidden baby thats what i got

Get under my wheels(x3)

Depeche Mode - Jezebel

They call you Jezebel, Whenever we walk in
You're going straight to hell, For wanted acts of sin - they say,
and that I'll have to pay, But I need you just this way.

They call you Jezebel, For what you like to wear
You're morally unwell, They say you never care for me
But what the fail to see is that your games are the key

Open their eyes to the beauty
Open their hearts to the fun
Open their minds to the idea that you don't own someone

They call you Jezebel, Whenever men walk by
They say that they can tell, The longing in your eyes is realand how you really feel
But they can't see your appeal
Jezebel

210310 Labu, Underrated

Unikeb - Labu - LBJ - Kampong Jijan - Salak

Pumpkin was the order of the day.
We had cycled around this area numerous times & not know the significance of this place. Sad but most of us are rather blur about our own history. Go & ride by the N38 main road & you'll catch a glimpse of the huge pumpkin sculpture. The regular place where CIOCC's Clan cam-whores would stop for a snap.


me, Bokat, John John, Dr. Taufik, Rahman, Mr Won, Faris, Cikgu Hisyam,
Awie, Dr. Hassan & Bulat. my clone, Zharin, Wak Jali, & Baby.

Labu is a small town in Negeri Sembilan, Malaysia. The town is located between Seremban and Nilai. There is also a commuter train station that located here. How Labu Town got its name? I believe the kampong folks cultivated this plant in abundance when they first settled here.

During the Japanese occupation of Tanah Melayu, Labu became their headquarters as there were old railroads linking the peninsular from north to south. When they got tired of slashing & burning the crops to starve my forefathers, they resorted to chopping off the heads of locals. True? Due to KTMB double tracking works since 1995, most of these relics have disappeared.


Lyndon B. Johnson @ Labu bin Johnson

Former American President Lyndon B. Johnson once landed via a helicopter in Felda LBJ (1966), hence the name of the Felda settlement, Labu B. Johnson. The first and remains the only US President to ever visited Malaysia.
Excerpts of remarks upon Arriving at Subang Airport, Kuala Lumpur, October 30, 1966 “...I feel that I know you because Malaysia, like the United States, is a federation of States which were once colonies of Great Britain and because Malaysia is, like the United States, a nation of many diverse peoples, different religions, and different cultures..." Link here.

Butternut squash

Firstly, lemme explain to most of you out there who only know how to wallop this vege but wouldn't even know how the hell it looks like. Labu translated to English would be pumpkin or butternut squash. So Labu is a Pumpkin & vice versa. Scientifically a pumpkin is a gourd-like squash of the genus Cucurbita and the family Cucurbitaceae which is a creeper plant. They are typically orange or yellow and have many creases running from the stem to the bottom. Have a thick shell on the outside, with seeds and pulp on the inside.
Variations within the species are common. Locally you can also get butternut squash. This variety is very popular because it's so easy to use. It's small enough to serve a normal family without leftovers, and the rind is thin enough to peel off with a vegetable peeler. As an added bonus, the flavor is sweet, moist (Mmmm..) and pleasantly nutty. Eat too much you'll go loco...

The word pumpkin originates from the word "Pepon" (πέπων), which is Greek for “Large melon". I love a pair of solid looking ones. The French adapted this word to pompon, which the British changed to pumpion and later American colonists changed that to the word we use today, "pumpkin".

If you're thinking about Labu & Labi, it has got nothing to do with the pumpkin or the terrapin. The latter apparently is an aphrodisiac, deliciously made into a bowl of soup. Labu & Labi refers to a comedy directed by the late Tan Sri P. Ramlee, my kampong neighbor. Both of us migrated from Pulau Pinang but he made it big in Singapura. During the 11th century, Singapura was attacked by schools of swordfish because someone said a boy "Cried Wolf".

Ironically "John Labu" was the name given to M. Zain, P. Ramlee's partner in this classic movie.

The 1963 production is a story about Haji Bakhil, a miser with two servants, Labu - the cook, and Labi - the driver. The two of them have secret admiration for Haji Bakhil's beautiful daughter, Manisah. After a hard day's work, Labu and Labi started talking about their girlfriend not knowing that they both admire the same women. During bedtime, they lamented to each other about their life being poor and wondered what would happen if they were rich and famous. Labu pretended that he was a doctor, Tarzan, cowboy and Labi a magistrate judge...

As simple as it is, a pumpkin has carved its name in the Guinness Book of World Records.The largest & heaviest record breaking pumpkin weighs a whooping 1,725-pound (782 kilograms)!!! If I got my face in-between those, I'll suffocate & die with pleasure.

Jack O Lanters for Halloween

Carving pumpkins (Jack O Lantern) preceded the Great Famine period of Irish immigration and was originally associated with harvest time in general, not becoming specifically associated with Halloween until the mid-to-late 1800s. In medieval time these candle lantern were initially carved from turnips (Sengkuang).
In Malaysia the sengkuang will be skinned alive, stripped bare from its skin, sliced 1/2 cm into a few slices. They will then be topped with a generous amount thick soy bean spread (Kuah rojak hitam). A sprinkle of "Belachan/Fermented shrimp cube", "Otak udang"/Shrimp paste) grounded/blended ground nuts & sugar will add flavor. Muaaaah! If you're born in the 70's you're one lucky bugger. For a sunny day, a shaved iced ball poured over with syrup is most welcome too.
It leaves a lingering taste in your tongue. Mummy...!!! I wanna turn back the clock...

For the Malay community, the pumpkin leaves are also a popular vegetable to be cooked with coconut milk = "Masak Lemak Daun Labu" minus the terrapin meat. It’s sweet but not sugary like. Add some sweet potatoes, mash & eat it with newly cooked rice. The leaves can be an "Ulam" which you dip into "Sambal Belachan"/Pounded chilies with roasted shrimp cube. Once you've tasted it, I bet you wouldn’t even notice your mother in-law passing by!

Pumpkin made into "Labu Sira" dessert.

"Labu Sira" is pumpkin/butternut squash cooked in palm sugar. It is traditionally served during special occasions/weddings.

Pumpkin in Palm Sugar Recipe

Ingredients (Enuff to serve 3-4 clones)
1 Medium size pumpkin
5 Tablespoon sugar
2-3 Pandan leaves (Pandanus amaryllifolius)
1/2 pcs palm sugar/brown sugar
2-3 Teaspoon salt
2-3 Teaspoon liquid limestone / Kapur makan not kapur tulis (Not blackboard chalk!)

How to go about doing it.
Peel the skin, cut into half lengthwise/ quarter & sub-quarter it into small chunks or chop them (Not too small please). Spread some liquid limestone & leave it for an hour (To ensure that the pumpkin would not go overly gooey/too soft). Wash them thoroughly later & boil them with sugar, Pandan leaves & salt. Splash with water & with the ingredients on low heat, add palm sugar/brown sugar and mix. Leave it for 30 min with the lid. When they have gone tender (Checklah...not too soft), let it cool. Serve them chilled ; P

*It can stay fresh up to one week, when refrigerated.

Do you know that the chemical compounds found in pumpkin promote regeneration of damaged pancreatic cells? Resulting in increased bloodstream insulin levels. According to the research, pumpkin extract may be "a very good product for pre-diabetic people, as well as those who already have diabetes," possibly reducing or eliminating the need for insulin injections for some type of diabetics.

Labu in Malay could also suggest the calves’ size of a person, besides the normal term "Betis". No wonder John John & Faris sped ahead like a torpedo - Both of them have muscular "Labu's".
In the northern parts of Malaysia, a person's calves can also be referred as "Anak Anjing/Puppy". An old term which is rarely used nowadays.


Uncanny resemblance?

Other Labu meaning,
1) Labu sayong, a pottery craft.
2) My mom would say "Azman, skin a "Labu/Bulb" off garlic". Se-labu bawang putih = A large "Bulb" of garlic (Notice the garlic & the pottery? Uncanny resemblance to the pumpkin eh?)
3) Anatomical wise - His/her belly looks like an overgrown "Labu" or she has a nice pair of "Labu/Jugs". He he he...

Dr. Hassan & Faris

Dr. Taufik & Awie jelingan manja...aww!

Other than some history lessons & recipe to make your saliva trickle, it was a fun & fast ride with some new friends. Dr. Hassan, Faris, Dr. Taufik & Awie the firefighter. Kudos to Bokat & Bulat, u guys have improved tremendously. Syabas!!!

To Syarul Hulk, that's a fancy "PANAURELLO". Bro, with or without "Panau"/Tinea Versicolor or Pityriasis Versicolor (a condition characterized by a rash on the trunk and proximal extremities), you're still the same.

Two doctors will tell you the benefit of exercise & good eating habits. John John can tell a tale or two about nutritions.

Nutritional Value & Health Benefits for the mad cyclist.
The orange-flesh is a dead giveaway that pumpkin is a source of beta carotene which is a powerful antioxidant. Beta carotene is converted to vitamin A in the body. Vitamin A is essential for healthy skin, vision, bone development and many other functions.
Just look at me, I'm pushing 45 but with the helmet, jersey, tanned skin & slim physique, I'm a dead give away 25 year horny dude!!! Vain vain vain...
Pumpkin is also a tasty source of carbohydrates and potassium.

Nutrition Facts (1 cup cooked mashed pumpkin)

Calories 24
Protein 1 gram

Carbohydrates 5.98 grams
Dietary Fiber 1 gram

Potassium 280.6 mg

Phosphorus 36.6 mg

Vitamin A 1320 IU

Vitamin C 5.73 mg

No wonder Dr. Hassan had some mashed pumpkin in Salak town.

Last but not least, The Clan would like to wish Dr. Hassan - "Happy 49th. Birthday". Thank you for "Belanjaying/threating" RM50.
49-50 = 4950, Wah! can strike 4D, sure kena one...

Njoy Ridin' & Gobblin'!

Google route

140310 Steaming Hot Cicada

Gombak - Air Panas, Bentong, Pahang

When Don told me that he's ridin to Hot Springs Bentong, I went "Ahhhhh..."That would be "A cool under the shade ride". Yes brudda & sista, it's a cool canopy ride all right but you'll need to tackle 2 hills & hit that 1 Son of a Gun!

Picked up John John at half past five (5:30am) & did the Subuh prayers in Masjid Gombak. After all that settled, without changing the sarong & removing the skullcap, we set-up the bikes & sat for a cuppa tea. Just as we're about to roll, juices from the sky poured..

Some began to have second thoughts about ridin. Drove all the way from Bangi & not ride? C'mon...

Cheese sandwich never tasted better with rainwater spewing all over it.

Took it easy this time. I know, hammering these hills would spell disaster for the rest of the journey. The 1st group left us quite a bit, but I keep tellin myself to let them go. Ride at your own pace. Teamed up with a couple of blokes & spun merrily till Sempah.

I know this guy, but nevah knew his name. Cheerful fellow from Batu Arang or Rawang.

Coz he aint got no air,

With his trusty ol' bike, he cycles everywhere,

Make friends with anyone black, green or yellow hair,

Sometimes he would enter a race without much care,

And will never go around boasting with fanfare,

Like the tortoise foe - the Hare.

A guard dog greeted us at the usual stop with garlands & all. He is no ordinary dog, he was stationed there to make sure all those road hoggers don't bother us. Watched us roll by without winking, with a longing look - hoping that some rider would offer him brunch. All he got was a pat on the back with his back hunched.

As were rollin down to Bentong Hot Springs, the shrills were gettin the better of me. The cicadas were extremely noisy that day. It was havoc! Besides the regular mating song, they were doin a distinct distress call, courtship song, which is often a quieter call (Not trunk calls to Borneo) which is produced after a female has been drawn by the male calling song.

Probably the rain had made them hornier. Well, from experience - certain part of the anatomy can gets pretty stiff in cold weather. Ha ha!

Maua Albigutta is a cicada species that is widely distributed in Sumatra and Peninsular Malaysia. The Malays word for cicada is "Riang-Riang" = Happy-Happy = Gay-Gay, no no no. They're not homo but seem extremely happy all of the time. The other species, Pomponia Imperatoria is also from Malaysia, have prominent eyes set wide apart on the sides of the head, short antennae protruding between or in front of the eyes, and membranous front wings. Looks like an elongated-overweight shit fly.

If you caught a cicada, hold it with your thumb underneath its Timbal, apply pressure lightly & it will let out a buzzing sound! Timbal is a term for a vibrating membrane in the abdomen of a male cicada, which is responsible for the characteristic sound produced by the insect.

By about 15 mins to 10am we arrived in Bentong Hot Springs. Stopped by the side of the entrance & all of them were munchin somethin. Of course not the roasted cicada. I was still quite solid after the typical 3 pcs of bread & 2 slices of cheese. No worries of gettin malnourished.

What a pity, I kinda disappointed coz there’s no stalls & mini market around, need to refill my water bottle. Not that I'll get dehydrated on the away back but just to be prepared. What do you expect Azman? Giant? Bintang Hypermarket. Look, you’re smack in the middle of the jungle. But it’s only 10km more to Bentong town.

I could feel the tranquility of this place. Birds chirping, slow motion steams rising from the hot springs. Theres even a suspension bridge across the river on the side of the road. Felt like venturing on it but on second thoughts, I noticed the planks are kinda dated. The river damn looks inviting but I don’t wanna slip & do the gymnastics.

The hot springs waters may be warm but the depth & the murky water scares me. With lush greenery, verdant & far from the intoxicating fumes, I think this place needs some sprucing-up & promo from the state. You don’t need multi millions bucks for this. Sayang aduhai sayang puteri santubong, this place can be wonderful.

This IS the natural hot springs & its filled with soft sulphur, mud and sand. It has healing properties for those with sensitive skin. My eldest son Arief had an endless problem with eczema when he was 7. What we did was to apply some sulphur that we scoured from the bottom of the pool & wahlah! It worked! After a long day pedaling, the tired legs needs the dipping so badly but time wasn't on our side. We have to move on.

The springs are located about 10 km before Bentong town on the old road. (Highway 68) between KL and Bentong. If youre exiting via Genting sempah, I’ll be a 20km "Winding till you puke" kind of road.

I don't wanna scare you but some areas feels rather eerie, devoid of nothing...You’re damned if you have mechanical problems here. For you riders out there, ride with a couple of "Happy-happy" people. It's way-way faster to continue to the Bentong exit and drive the 6-7km back.

Riding under the canopy is a blessing, except you gotta concentrate on what you roll on. It can get very slippery at times. Some areas were as dry as a pharaoh’s mummy, not even a bone can be drier than that. We were just doin like 20kph on the way back to Genting Sempah. Yu Kit stood up a couple of times as his "Little Brother" has started to feel numb. Chris & I pulled away as Malcolm dropped back a little. I felt strong but reserved the energy for the 1km "Killer Klimb!"

We stopped by the chestnut stalls in Genting Sempah & waited up for Yu Kit & Malcolm. I was tempted again to ask the hawkers if they had ever fried or roasted a cicada but just I didn't have the heart. Just gave them a big smirk. If I did that, they would think I've gone loony.

Locals don't eat cicadas. Some people from other parts of South East Asia do. The closest I've had was fried grasshoppers/locust with minced chilies. Superb! But you can’t beat Ulat Mulong / Sago Tree Larvae, yummy...How to cook a Sago Tree Larve? For the recipe click here.

Deep fried - skewered cicadas & grasshoppers

Ending the 10 min break, Chris said that "Only people with high I.Q. would use the right side of the road to the top". Yu Kit said "That’s the chicken route!" which he then decided to use.

If you don’t feel so good, go have some chicken soup = If you're not up to it, don't force yourself.

me, Yu Kit, Malcolm (NZ), Chris (GBR) & my twin

I'm gonna whip that Son of a Gun today, which I did. Yeahooo! Didn't even blink. Whoa! How did I do it? Sit, relax & tackle it inch by inch. If you think you can gobble it in one gulp - who's stoppin you?

The dreaded twins

Just enjoyed the fruits of my labour & rolled down without much thought. My soul flew across the ocean & the cool breeze flowed over my cheeks like a virgin's caress...


SM Teknik Gombak - Hot Springs, Bentong, Pahang

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